Amanda Monti, 24, flew into a rage when Geoffrey Jones, 37, rejected her advances at the end of a house party, Liverpool Crown Court heard.
She pulled off his left testicle and tried to swallow it, before spitting it out. A friend handed it back to Mr Jones saying: "That's yours." (Oh really? I thought it was Terry Brandons....hadn't even noticed it was missing...)
Monti admitted wounding and was jailed for two-and-a-half years.
'Pulled hard'
Sentencing Monti, Judge Charles James said it was "a very serious injury" and that Monti was not acting in self-defence.
The court heard that Mr Jones had ended his long-term but "open relationship" with Monti towards the end of May last year.
The pair remained on good terms and on 30 May she picked him up from a party in Crosby and went back for drinks with friends at Mr Jones's house.
An argument ensued and Mr Jones said there was a struggle between them.
In his statement, Mr Jones said she grabbed his genitals and "pulled hard".
I am in no way a violent person Pfft!
He added: "That caused my underpants to come off and I found I was completely naked and in excruciating pain." (I wonder why...)
The court heard that a friend saw Monti put Mr Jones's testicle into her mouth and try to swallow it.
She choked and spat it back into her hand URGH!!! before the friend (What a great friend!)grabbed it and gave it back to Mr Jones (Their you go mate.....have your testicle back...). Doctors were unable to re-attach the organ.
In a letter to the court, Monti said she was sorry for what she had done.
She said: "It was never my intention to cause harm to Geoff and the fact that I have caused him injury will live with me forever. I am in no way a violent person." Yeah okay! All of us 'non-violent' people go around pulling off testicles
Urgh. Urgh. Urgh.
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